Blog #37--Forgiveness Requires Understanding and Open Heart

I spend a great deal of time talking about forgiveness in my book “It’s a Secret, So Pass It On: a Toolbox For Life.” It is a vital aspect of spiritual awareness and practice, yet most of us find it difficult to accomplish in our daily lives. We are so busy judging and blaming others, we limit our potential as souls.

Forgiveness is not a matter best left to our creator despite claims by numerous religious leaders. We are said to be “made in God’s image.” If our creator can forgive, then so can we. The tools I share in my book are examples of how we can find the wisdom and strength to look beyond petty grievances for our commonality with our fellow travelers in this world.

It is not enough to follow blindly the dictates of our leaders; we must also understand how and why forgiveness is not only possible but necessary for our own evolution as souls. A comment made by a highly paid public figure many years ago still disturbs me. He said multiple times, often with a touch of anger in his voice, “My religion requires me to forgive, so I forgive.” But is it really forgiveness if it is not given freely or limited by negative emotions?

Those who understand the importance of forgiveness for their own spiritual growth may say they forgive others, but saying and doing are not the same thing. It doesn’t matter what others think of our actions and presumed reverence. What is important is whether we personally embrace our stated beliefs, making them a consistent aspect of our existence.

That requires acceptance of life the way it is, not what we wish it to be. We are given brains to help us understand things. We are not whole unless we are willing to integrate understanding with faith. Acceptance and forgiveness are much easier if we understand what is really happening in our world.

When we are emotionally upset, we have less ability to think rationally. Thus, it is understandably difficult for us to forgive what we might initially believe are direct affronts to our self-interests. But if we look at the bigger picture, we might be able to recognize the continuing chain reaction that led up to the events in question. And if we can find enough commonality with our antagonists (similarities are numerous), we can begin to understand the pressures they were under prior to their inciting behaviors. Perhaps we would have behaved the same way if we’d been in their position.

We have far less control over our lives than we wish to believe. Most if not all events are aspects of the Karmic Wheel, which constantly seeks balance. This continuing chain of actions and reactions has continued since the beginning of time and provides a cosmic justice. We may or may not feel as if actions against us have found retribution within any one lifetime, but Nature eventually balances all things. Justice will be served, just not necessarily within our preferred time frame.

Those of us who continue to experience the same intense frustrations daily without letup can become intractable in the face of logic. Reading this blog will not change anything for them since they are convinced someone did them harm and got away with it, whether true or not. All we can do for them is allow them space and time to purge those negative vibrations from their systems so they can make room for a new paradigm.

I encourage the rest of us to look for our connections with our enemies. We are far more similar than different despite our denials. If we face situations honestly, we realize that we might have done the same things if we had been them. That is when we can begin to open our hearts and forgive. And that is when spiritual growth uplifts us and nurtures our future as spirits.

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