Blog #12--Cookbook Approach to Life Backfires

Blog #12—Cookbook Approach to Life Backfires, by Jack Tuttle http://dreamtime3.wix.com/jacktuttlebook

Most people look for the easy way out for their problems. This is especially true for followers, who readily do what their leaders tell them to do. Whether that is good or bad for their long-term welfare seems unimportant, as long as they are following precise rules that others have laid down for them. Being able to follow without thinking or over-exerting provides a sense of security for many. Even when their efforts backfire, they still prefer the painful known to the unknown.

School teaching methods that emphasize memorization for tests discourage children from thinking for themselves. This is also true for some youth religious programs. Children are often told what to learn and what to read. Sometimes, they are told what not to read, as well as who and what not to believe. When these children (especially the natural followers), grow up, they are already accustomed to following blindly, and they know only what their leaders want them to know. If their leaders are wrong, so are they, but as they say, “misery loves company.”

When I was studying animal behavior, I noticed that the methods dog trainers use to modify behavior work much better for them than their clients. They told people exactly what to do, but their clients had great difficulty mimicking not only the taught behavior but the attitude, energy and direct approach of the trainer. Their dogs respected the confident trainer, so they readily obeyed since they are hierarchical pack animals. But for many pet owners, dog training is problematic because the cookbook approach to behavior modification doesn’t always work for them.

In my book “It’s a Secret, So Pass It On: a Toolbox For Life,” I encourage people to develop a sense of independence because it is the only way we can recognize our equality with all other things, and sensing our connections to the rest of the world helps us develop spiritually. I’m not saying everyone should become a hermit and live alone; we are actually interdependent with everyone else. But we benefit when we think for ourselves as we live our normal lives.

Sometimes, the results will be a willingness to follow someone else’s guidelines, and sometimes it means going a different direction. But whatever we decide, the confidence of knowing we were involved in the process helps us to solve our problems better.

Religious institutions brag about rewards for total compliance. In many cases, they also provide a threat of punishment should one not obey their directives. When we fear banishment to an eternal hell or ex-communication from a cherished religion, we are manipulated easily. Unfortunately, no religion has cornered the market on truth.

I realize that statement will cause some people to react angrily and find fault with the author. After all, they depend heavily on the absolute certainty of their religious beliefs to provide comfort and security in difficult times. But despite a convincing attitude, religious leaders still cannot guarantee a specific afterlife reward for compliant behavior since no one who believes in the world of time and space, beginnings and endings, can also understand completely the concept of eternity. It sounds good, but details are lacking.

I do not discourage people from attending church or believing in an all-encompassing creator, especially if their religion gives them the peace of mind and balance to love everyone and everything in the world despite our seeming differences. Adapting societal recommendations to fit our own individual pathways is often beneficial. But a cookbook approach to spirituality is not the answer.

Every religion since the beginning of time on Earth has attempted to be the one true answer, but many people still die confused and scared for their futures. Anybody can say, “I’m saved.” Anyone can claim to be preferred by their creator or guaranteed eternal salvation simply by memorizing the main tenets of their religion. The ego loves to make such proclamations, but there is no evidence such behavior gets us closer to understanding our oneness with the cosmos or guarantees anything once we pass from our bodies.

If your religious and/or academic background makes increasingly less sense to you, try thinking for yourself more. A cookbook approach may sound preferable, but each of us learns and grows in our own way and time. Every path leads ultimately to spiritual oneness with our creator; recognizing that and accepting our pathway as being as valid as all others is the key. That is accomplished by thinking for ourselves and adapting approaches to fit our personal needs.

Comments and questions can be directed to dreamtime@insight-books.com